A Closer Look at Trauma and How It Affects the Brain

Most people understand that trauma can wreak havoc on your mental well-being—but it is so much more than just living with negative memories or fearful flashbacks. Traumatic experiences can actually change the chemistry and structure of your brain, leaving a lasting impact that is hard to heal from on your own.

The effects of trauma can linger for years because of these brain alterations, causing problems in everything from your career to your relationships.

Understanding how trauma affects the brain can be the necessary first step in coming to terms with your experience and seeking out the help you deserve. Here is a closer look at the changes your brain can go through after a traumatic event, and what you can do to start healing.

Boosted Amygdala Activity

The amygdala is the area of the brain responsible for processing your emotions—including fear. When you experience a traumatic event, the amygdala is not just triggered. It can become overly reactive. Essentially, your “fight-or-flight” response is on nearly all of the time. This causes heightened anxiety and can make you feel like there are threats everywhere, even when there are not.

While your brain’s response to fear is a survival mechanism, it is not something that is meant to be “on” all the time. If you start to react with impulse to perceived threats or you are always on alert, it is likely to cause a lot of stress and anxiety in your life.

A Blow to the Hippocampus

The hippocampus is responsible for memory storage and consolidation. Trauma can make it difficult for the hippocampus to work properly, so you might struggle with creating new memories.

If you have heard of trauma causing flashbacks and nightmares, that is also due to a dysfunction within the hippocampus. You are more likely to experience flashbacks of what happened to you. Because your new memories might not be getting stored properly, those flashbacks can often seem very real, making you feel like the traumatic experience is happening all over again.

Prefrontal Cortex Problems

The prefrontal cortex controls rational thinking and problem-solving within the brain. When you have experienced trauma, it can become less effective. That can make it difficult to think things through, overcome challenges, or see the bigger picture of a problem.

Children and teens do not have a fully developed prefrontal cortex. How do they think about things? They often lead with emotions and are not always thinking about the long-term consequences of their actions. The same problem can happen when your prefrontal cortex becomes less effective. Unfortunately, as an adult, having trouble concentrating or problem-solving can create issues in your relationships, your career, and more.

Healing the Brain

It can be scary and overwhelming to think that your brain changes after a traumatic experience. But, with the right treatment and support, you can heal from the effects of trauma and retrain your brain to work the way it should again.

There are many things you can do on your own to promote healing in your daily life. Self-care practices, mindfulness, meditation, and journaling are all great ways to start fighting back against the effects of trauma—including negative invasive thoughts.

The best way to walk through your healing journey is to work with a mental health professional. Trauma therapy can help you dig into the core of your trauma. When you learn where it stems from, you can start to challenge the negative thoughts while managing your symptoms more effectively. All the while, you will be healing the impact of trauma on your brain, so things will start to work normally once again.

If you are ready to take that step or you want to learn more, feel free to contact my office for a consultation.

Complicated Grief: What to Know and How to Heal

Almost everyone will experience grief at some point in life. We all go through periods of loss, and grief can come from more than just losing someone you love. It can happen when you lose a job, sell a home, or make another major life change.

Complicated grief, however, is a bit different. It’s an ongoing, heightened sense of mourning. This kind of grief often prevents the person dealing with it from fully healing and moving forward with their life.

What causes complicated grief, and how is it different? More importantly, what can you do to heal and find peace when you’re dealing with it? Let’s take a closer look.

What Causes Complicated Grief?

There isn’t one underlying cause that creates complicated grief. Rather, it typically has to do with several factors, including the type of loss you’re experiencing and your mental health state or history.

For example, complicated grief is more likely to occur when there’s an unexpected or shocking death, like a tragic accident or suicide. Experiencing multiple losses at once can also contribute to this kind of grief.

On a personal level, everything from a history of anxiety or depression, or negative childhood experiences, to social isolation can increase your risk of experiencing complicated grief. These factors often make it more likely to develop a preoccupation with the loss you’re experiencing, so it’s hard to think about anything else, let alone move forward.

What Are the Symptoms?

On the surface, the symptoms of complicated grief look similar to “normal” grief. But you’re likely to experience more intense, harmful feelings that can quickly have a negative impact on your quality of life.

Complicated grief creates intense emotional pain. You’re likely to experience longing, loneliness, sadness, and potentially even anger or guilt. Some people struggle with identity disruption. You might feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself and you don’t know who you are.

It usually doesn’t take long for the effects of complicated grief to impact nearly every area of life. You might have trouble simply getting through the day and functioning the way you should. It can cause sleep disturbances, physical health problems like a loss of appetite, and even suicidal thoughts.

How Can You Heal?

When you’re dealing with complicated grief, the weight of your emotions can often feel overwhelming. Don’t try to sweep those feelings under the rug. Acknowledging them is the first step toward healing. Be patient with yourself and show self-compassion. When you stop trying to fight your feelings, you can start to work through them.

But don’t do it alone.

Complicated grief can cause you to want to isolate yourself, but that’s likely to make your symptoms worse. Grief therapy is often the best way to work through this type of grief and finally find some peace. Through the therapeutic experience, you’ll learn how to process your emotions, work through negative thoughts, and discover healthy coping mechanisms that will help you with everyday symptoms.

Therapy also helps you set realistic goals for yourself. You can break down the healing process into smaller pieces so it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. When you reach each small goal, it can provide a boost of confidence and give you the motivation you need to continue your journey.

Therapy will also encourage you to practice self-care. Doing at least one thing to promote your well-being each day can make a big difference in how you feel, physically and mentally. Self-care practices will help you see how important it is to truly heal and start the next chapter of your life.

Dealing with any kind of loss is never easy, but complicated grief shouldn’t keep you from truly living your life. If you’re ready to start healing, feel free to reach out today.

Tips for Communicating Effectively as a Family

It can seem like some families just “click” when it comes to communication. Everyone is open and honest and has no problems showing vulnerability. But that is not the case for everyone.

Family communication does not always come naturally. Personalities can be a factor, as well as family history or simply the dynamic everyone grew up with, but ignoring communication issues within your family will only make matters worse. It is important to be able to communicate with each other in healthy, effective ways that will carry on to the next generation.

With that in mind, here are some tips you can use to communicate effectively as a family so you can start putting them into practice right away.

Be an Active Listener

Communication is a two-way street. While being able to talk about your feelings and needs is important, it is just as essential to be a good listener.

Listening and hearing are two different things. To be an active listener, eliminate distractions when a family member is trying to talk to you. Give them the time and space they need to express themselves, and make sure your attention is on them.

Use verbal and nonverbal cues to let them know that you are listening. Ask questions and repeat statements as needed. This kind of listening will help that person feel understood and valued. Not only will it improve communication, but it will make them more likely to be an active listener when you speak, too.

Use “I” Statements

It can be easy to play the blame game in relationships — including familial ones, but even if a family member is hurting or challenging you in some way, try to avoid pointing fingers.

Instead of suggesting that they are in the wrong, use “I” statements to let them know how you feel about the issue. Chances are, your family is not trying to hurt you or cause problems on purpose. When they know how things are affecting you, the negative actions are more likely to stop.

Shift Perspective

One of the great things about families is that they are made up of many different personalities. Of course, that can also be what causes everyone to clash sometimes.

Empathy is an important communication tool, especially when it comes to dealing with family members. Try to shift your perspective and think about how other family members might be thinking or feeling. When you acknowledge those feelings, you can respond with compassion and respect.

Individual Communication Styles

You are not always going to have big family meetings with everyone involved. While it can be great to get multiple people together as often as possible, most of your interactions with family members will probably be one-on-one.

So, try to learn and understand everyone’s different communication styles. Everyone has unique needs and feelings. By focusing on those things while communicating with one person at a time, you can adjust your own communication style to meet those needs. Doing so is likely to result in a better, more open experience for all parties during every conversation.

Reach Out for Help

Again, family communication is important, but it is not always easy. If you feel like there are roadblocks keeping you from healthy, effective communication with your family, you do not have to work through them alone.

Family therapy is a great way to better understand why those roadblocks are there. What caused them, and what can you do about them? You will learn more about your own communication style and needs, and healthy ways to show vulnerability and open up around your family. Feel free to reach out for more information or to set up a consultation soon.

How Common Is Infidelity? Exploring the Prevalence and Impact in Modern Relationships

Most people recognize cheating in relationships as a negative thing, but that doesn’t necessarily stop them from doing it. In fact, recent studies have shown that infidelity in modern relationships is fairly common.

About 20% of men and 13% of women have reported cheating on a partner. While there are countless factors that can play into infidelity, those statistics might be a bit shocking to some.

So, why do people cheat? Why is infidelity so common, and what impact is it having on today’s relationships?

The Monogamy Argument

Some people argue that monogamy is natural for humans, but that might not necessarily be true. Most species in the animal kingdom do not mate for life, with a few exceptions — including, supposedly, humans.

People argue the validity of monogamy using many different factors to back them up. Often, Biblical arguments are used, but so many major figures of the Bible had multiple wives and tended to practice more polygamous lifestyles.

There is not some kind of test that can be performed to determine if humans are naturally monogamous or not, but one might argue that if we are, why is infidelity such a major issue? Why is it the subject of so many movies, television shows, and songs? Why do we spend so much time talking about it, thinking about it, and dissecting it? It is something on our minds and something we want to learn more about, so the idea of staying with one person for life might not be as “natural” as some people think.

Why Do People Cheat?

Again, there are countless reasons why people decide to commit adultery in a relationship. Some of the most common causes include unmet needs (physical or emotional), poor communication, self-esteem issues, attachment issues, or the desire for something new.

Infidelity is a different experience for everyone. Some people specifically seek out new relationships as something different and exciting. Others find opportunity in the least-expected places and take advantage of it.

A Slippery Slope

Some people today do not believe that humans are naturally monogamous, so they are completely okay with the idea of an open relationship. They might have a committed partner, but both people are free to date others, and even be intimate with others.

While both partners are not necessarily cheating, by their own definitions, these actions can still take a toll on the relationship.

The Impact of Infidelity

No matter the reason, there is no denying that infidelity can take a toll on a relationship. First, it impacts trust. If you are in a committed relationship and you cheat on your partner, it will be extremely difficult for them to trust you again. If someone cheats on you, that lack of trust might carry over into future relationships.

Cheating can also lead to mental health issues like depression or anxiety. You might start to feel insecure and carry those worries with you into other areas of life.

Even in an open relationship, your partner being with someone else can wreak havoc on your mental well-being. You might start to wonder why they prefer that person over you. It can impact your self-esteem and the way you carry yourself. Whether you stay in that relationship or not, viewing yourself in a negative light can create attachment or dependency issues and foster unhealthy relationship habits.

No matter how you feel about infidelity or how common it is, there’s no denying the negative impact it can have on relationships and individuals. If you are struggling with the aftermath of infidelity, being able to talk to someone is key. Do not hesitate to reach out for help and schedule a consultation for couples therapy soon.

5 Signs of High-Functioning Depression

Depression isn’t a one-size-fits-all condition. While most people understand the basics of what it looks like, it can impact everyone differently. Some people might have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning. Others — especially those with high-functioning depression — are often able to live normal lives on the surface.

But what is high-functioning depression?

It doesn’t mean you push down your feelings or pretend you’re not really struggling. Rather, it’s a way to describe people with depression who are able to get through their daily tasks.

Let’s take a look at some signs of high-functioning depression. If you’re dealing with it, you deserve the same help and support as someone dealing with severe depression, so it’s important to know what to look for.

1. Hard to See the Bright Side

Maybe you have a hard time thinking about anything in a positive light. Do you consider yourself to be somewhat of a “downer?” Maybe people have even called you that before.

Your negative, sad thoughts might not stop you from getting up in the morning, going to work, or caring for yourself or your family, but they’re always there. They’re persistent and make it difficult to see the bright side of things.

2. You’re Hard on Yourself

High-functioning depression can make you highly critical of yourself. Even when someone chooses to give you a compliment, you might not believe it or you might see a negative contrast.

You might even look for ways to put yourself down. This kind of negative self-talk fuels depression and perpetuates the cycle. You might be able to interact with others and even stay social, but when you’re not kind to yourself, those settings become uncomfortable and sometimes overwhelming.

3. Weight Changes

One of the symptoms of depression is a change in your eating habits. This is just as true for high-functioning depression. In fact, you might turn to food even more frequently as a way to find comfort or to combat negative feelings while ensuring you’re still getting through the day.

While overeating to cope with depression can cause you to gain weight, some people with high-functioning depression experience the opposite issue. They forget to eat because their thoughts are so distracting. So, they tend to lose weight. These fluctuations aren’t just clear signs of depression, but they can also be dangerous to your physical well-being.

4. Struggling to Feel Normal

To the outside world, you might be going through life like everyone else. People might notice that you seem sad or down sometimes, but because you’re able to keep up with school or work, they likely won’t assume anything is wrong.

You might not think anything is wrong, either. When you have consistent, persistent feelings of sadness, you might start to get used to them, and assume that’s just how things are, rather than acknowledging there’s a bigger problem.

So, even if you can get through your daily tasks, think about how difficult it is. Do you struggle to get things done? Do you lack motivation and find yourself having to “push through?” That’s likely a sign of something bigger than simple sadness.

5. Feeling Hopeless

High-functioning depression doesn’t necessarily take away the thoughts of sadness and hopelessness that often go with this condition. You might be able to get through the workday, but do you find yourself often crying at home? Maybe when you walk through the door and sit down on the couch for the night, you feel your lowest because your thoughts are able to creep in without any distractions to help.

Unfortunately, there are many other signs of high-functioning depression, but knowing just a few can be the motivation you need to seek help. You don’t have to live this way forever. Depression therapy can help you better understand the root of your depression while offering valuable strategies for symptom management. If you’re interested in learning more, reach out for a consultation today.

How to Start Practicing Radical Acceptance Now

So many people spend a lot of time trying to stay in control. In reality, there are very few things in life that we actually have complete control over. When you fight against those things, it can lead to stress, anxiety, and other mental health issues.

Instead, consider adopting a mindset of radical acceptance.

Radical acceptance is more than a distress tolerance skill. It’s a way to accept and work through life’s challenges and difficult situations by realizing that some things are simply out of your control.

Of course, practicing radical acceptance can take a bit of effort. Let’s take a closer look at what this skill really is and how you can start to change the way you think in dealing with whatever curveballs life throws your way.

What Is Radical Acceptance?

Fighting back against the things you can’t change or control can cause a lot of discord in your life. Even if you don’t necessarily consider yourself a perfectionist, there are many things you might wish you could change, but simply can’t.

Letting go of that desire to fight back can make a big difference.

Radical acceptance is the practice of accepting the things that can’t be changed. The idea is that by fully embracing the things out of your control, you’ll reduce suffering in your life.

You can still acknowledge your emotions and how certain situations make you feel. Radical acceptance doesn’t mean you should ignore or avoid difficult situations. Rather, you can feel sad, frustrated, or even upset about certain things without trying to change them. Accepting what’s out of your control can actually make it easier to navigate those emotions and work through them in healthy ways.

Identify What You Can’t Control

The first step in practicing radical acceptance is to learn what your triggers are. Is there something out of your control that you’ve been fighting back against? When you recognize which aspects of a situation are out of your hands, you can start to let go.

As soon as you’re able to do that, you can also pay closer attention to your emotions. You’ll be able to gain a better perspective on how often you tend to resist what’s going to happen. Being more in tune with your emotions can make it easier to process them in healthier, more effective ways.

Be More Mindful

Mindfulness is the practice of staying in the moment. Life is full of “what ifs,” and those can fuel situations that are out of our control. But when you start dwelling on the past or thinking about the future, it can give you a false sense of control, causing you to want to resist reality.

When you choose to be more mindful, you’ll stay grounded in the present. Close your eyes and focus on deep breaths as you take in the sounds, smells, and feelings of your surroundings. This practice can help to calm you down and be more accepting of the challenges ahead of you.

Speak Acceptance Out Loud

This can take some practice, but actually accepting the things you can’t control out loud can make a big difference.

Consider saying things like, “It is what it is,” or “This is out of my control.” It’s okay to start small, and you should be kind and compassionate to yourself as you attempt to release the things you can’t change. By putting these small sayings out there, they can feel more real and concrete.

Practicing radical acceptance takes time, and you might be tempted to slip back into resisting more than once. If you’re looking for additional help with this practice or learn more about anxiety treatment, contact me for more effective strategies and insight into why radical acceptance can make such a difference in your life.

What Is Reparenting?

In a perfect world, everyone would grow up with loving parents or caregivers. They would experience the right amount of emotional and physical attention, support, and nurturing. They would form secure bonds and attachments from an early age that would allow them to feel that sense of security in all relationships as they grow.

Unfortunately, we all know we don’t live in that world. Far too often, the emotional and physical needs of children aren’t met. It can lead to serious psychological issues later in life, impacting relationships, personal views, and so much more.

That’s why the practice of reparenting has become increasingly popular as a way to heal emotional childhood wounds.

Let’s take a closer look at reparenting, what it really is, and how you can use it to give yourself the care you deserved as a child.

What Does Reparenting Really Mean?

The concept of reparenting isn’t new. It’s been around in some form since the 1970s, though has undergone changes over the years. Today, most reparenting is considered self-reparenting. It focuses on the idea that if you had unmet emotional or physical needs as a child, you can essentially give yourself what your caregivers did not.

Maybe you had a caregiver who lacked affection, made you feel unsafe, or didn’t provide structure in your life. As an adult, you can learn new ways to harness those things yourself. You’ll develop a greater sense of self and learn how to foster healthy relationships along the way. Ultimately, the goal is to achieve whatever you were lacking in childhood due to your parent or caregiver.

Why Reparenting Can Be Helpful

Reparenting can be impactful for anyone who experienced a childhood with unmet needs. Maybe you’ve tried to repress some of those negative memories, but they’ve led to unhealthy habits as an adult.

With that being said, reparenting can be helpful if you’re trying to overcome those unhealthy patterns. Maybe you have trouble communicating effectively, or your own insecurities tend to sabotage relationships.

By breaking down negative patterns that stem from childhood, you’re able to learn healthier, more effective ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving.

Reparenting gives you the opportunity to learn what healthy communication looks like, as well as healthy relationships. Most importantly, you’ll learn how to better understand and express your emotions. Not only will that improve your sense of self, but it will make it easier to understand others, especially when it comes to relationships.

What to Expect

The process of reparenting takes time. After all, you’re trying to break patterns and habits that began years ago. But you don’t have to do it on your own. Even if you’re considering self-reparenting, consider working with a therapist to help guide you through the process.

Keep in mind that part of the process will likely include looking back on painful experiences from childhood. If you’ve been trying to avoid or ignore those experiences, this can be a difficult journey—but it’s a necessary first step in the healing process.

In addition to looking back on where the negative patterns came from, you’ll learn how to exchange them for healthier habits that can completely change the way you see yourself and those around you. Be patient with yourself, show self-compassion and kindness, and keep your expectations realistic. If you’re frustrated with your progress or run into bumps in the road due to negative thought patterns, talk things through with your therapist.

You don’t have to live with the effects of attachment issues or unmet needs from childhood forever. Reparenting is a great way to break the cycle of negativity that’s likely had a hold on your life for too long. If you’re interested in learning more, please contact us for information about trauma therapy or to set up an appointment.

Fostering a Positive Self-Image in Teens

The teenage years can be difficult. Teens go through a lot that you might not think about. They’re dealing with hormonal and bodily changes. They’re trying to fit in, socially, while staying true to themselves. On top of that, they’re learning who they really are and who they want to be. 

Add in academic pressure and worries about what they might do in the future, and it’s no wonder so many teens struggle with mental health issues — including poor self-image. 

Promoting a sense of mental well-being for the teenager in your life is important. It will teach them how to prioritize their mental health at an early age. If you notice that your teen is struggling specifically with self-image, there are things you can do to help them change their perspective, too. 

Let’s look at a few different ways you can foster a positive self-image in teens. 

Validate Their Feelings

Even if your teen is dealing with negative feelings, it’s important that they feel seen, heard, and understood. 

Let them know their feelings are valid. Talk to them about better understanding where those feelings come from. When they know what’s causing a negative self-image, they’ll be able to start fighting back against it. It will also give you a better idea of how to help them work through things. 

Validation is key in letting them know that their feelings matter — including the negative ones. 

Avoid Comparisons

It’s human nature to compare ourselves to other people. Unfortunately, that seems to be an even bigger problem for teens, especially in this social media-filled world. 

Encourage your teen to be self-compassionate and kind to themselves. Help them avoid comparisons by limiting social media time and instead having them focus on their strengths and positive qualities. 

Positive affirmations each day can help your teen recognize their value and worth. They’ll start to see everything they have to offer that’s unique and specific to them, so they’ll be less likely to stick to comparisons of other people. 

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness can be used for more than just anxiety. It’s a great way for teens to pause and start thinking about how they can respond to negative thoughts in a positive, productive way. 

It’s not uncommon for teenagers to be impulsive of make quick decisions without thinking things through. By encouraging mindfulness, you can help your teen slow down to look at the reality of a situation. Sometimes, that’s all it takes to keep negative self-talk from creeping in. 

Be a Positive Role Model

It might not always seem like your teenager is watching you, but they are. You are still the first person they look to when it comes to how they should live their life. 

So, make sure you’re living yours with a positive self-image. Don’t put yourself down or focus on the negative things about yourself you want to change. Show confidence and self-compassion, and avoid comparing yourself to others. 

By being a positive self-image role model, you’ll give your teen a blueprint for how they can see themselves in a better light without letting external factors change their perspective. 

Self-Care

Self-care looks different for everyone, especially depending on the stage of life you’re in. For a teenager, it might include getting enough sleep, staying physically active, journaling, or meditating. 

Self-care is a great way to encourage mental wellness at any age. It can help to reduce your teen’s stress while allowing them to foster a positive self-image. When they recognize they’re worthy of daily self-care, they’re more likely to feel confident and comfortable in their own skin. 

If you’re concerned that your teen is still struggling with self-image issues, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Again, encouraging mental wellness now can go a long way for your teen’s future. Contact me for more information or to set up an appointment for family counseling soon. 

How Ignoring Communication Issues Can Harm a Couple

Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. Most people understand its importance, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they prioritize it. Some people even choose to ignore communication issues within their relationship. 

While you might be able to sweep those issues under the rug for a while, it’s not a sustainable practice. 

If you’re dealing with communication issues in your relationship and trying to ignore them, you could end up doing more harm than good. Let’s dig a little deeper into the problems you could be causing, and what you can do to fix those underlying problems. 

Mental Health Issues

A lack of healthy communication in your relationship can lead to a variety of mental health concerns. First, you and your partner might start to assume the worst about yourselves, each other, and your relationship as a whole. These assumptions, misconceptions, and misunderstandings can lead to anxiety, depression, and self-doubt. 

When you fall victim to mental health issues — especially depression — your relationship can start to feel hopeless. You might think that things will never get better, or that your partnership is doomed to fail. 

Anxiety, on the other hand, can make you hypervigilant in your relationship. You might start changing who you are in an attempt to “hang on” to your partner. These behaviors aren’t healthy for anyone, and they’ll end up harming your relationship even more. 

Lack of Growth

Maybe you try to ignore communication issues because you’ve been with your partner for a long time and assume you should just stick to the status quo. 

But, relationships aren’t meant to be static. 

People grow and change over time, and your relationship should do the same. If you’re ignoring communication issues or aren’t talking to each other about your needs and wants, your relationship is going to become stagnant. There will be no opportunity for growth, and you might grow to resent each other. 

Isolation

Some people try to ignore communication issues because they don’t want to rock the boat. Maybe you don’t like confrontation. Maybe you’re not sure exactly how to bring up certain issues. 

Unfortunately, by trying to avoid conflict, you’re likely going to end up making yourself and your partner feel more isolated and lonely. 

Even the healthiest, happiest couples argue and have disagreements. We’re not always supposed to think the exact same way. Conflicts can be healthy when you choose to approach them with respect. Arguing can strengthen your bond and make you feel closer, while ignoring issues can make you both feel like you’re in separate corners of the ring. 

When you ignore communication issues, it becomes difficult to remember that you and your partner are on the same team. So, even though you’re technically in a relationship, you’re likely to start doing more things on your own. 

Types of Communication Issues

Communication issues go deeper than just not expressing yourself fully. One of you could be passive-aggressive. Someone might constantly use generalized statements or play the blame game. Ignoring these issues will only make matters worse. You’ll start to feel bad about yourself, and wonder if there’s any way to change things, and it might even start to be the downfall of your relationship. 

Of course, addressing communication issues when you’ve been ignoring them for a long time is easier said than done. Don’t assume you have to tackle it on your own. 

Counseling is a great way to get to the bottom of those issues and learn where they stem from. Once they’re out in the open in a safe, neutral setting, you can work together as a couple with your counselor to put healthy, effective communication strategies in place. You might be surprised by how quickly things change, and how much stronger your relationship feels. 

If you’re ready to stop sweeping your communication issues under the rug, contact me today to set up an appointment for couples counseling. 

5 Signs Your Family Could Benefit from Therapy

Many people think of therapy as an individual experience, and it certainly can be. Working one-on-one with a therapist is a great way to deal with underlying mental health issues while learning how to prioritize your well-being. 

But, family therapy can also be beneficial. 

You might joke about having a “dysfunctional” family, or think that everyone’s family has their own issues. That might be true, to an extent. But, there are some clear signs that the problems in your family run deeper. If you’ve never considered family therapy before, it might be time to start, especially if the issues within your family unit are impacting your well-being. 

With that in mind, let’s look at a few signs your family could benefit from therapy, so you can take action. 

1. Constant Conflict

Families are made up of different personalities. You’re going to butt heads and deal with conflict at times. That doesn’t have to be a bad thing. 

If you’re able to work through your conflicts in healthy, effective ways, they can actually strengthen your family unit and make you closer. But, if there are frequent arguments and no one seems willing to compromise or see any perspective but their own, it’s a sign that therapy could be necessary.

2. Communication Issues

Healthy communication is essential in relationships — including familial ones. 

Maybe certain family members feel like they aren’t being heard, or that their feelings are being validated. Maybe you’re dealing with different communication styles and it’s causing tension. Some people might have a hard time truly listening and understanding what others are trying to say. 

Communication issues can wreak havoc on a family, but they can also often be remedied with the right kind of professional help.

3. Life Changes

Everyone deals with life transitions. Maybe it’s a big move to a new location, a job change, a divorce, or a death in the family. Whether the change is good or bad, it can cause stress within a family. Everyone handles stress differently, and your coping strategies might clash. 

Therapy can help your family work through major life changes together. Instead of trying to cope and move forward on your own, you can lean on one another, learn how to express your feelings and needs, and move forward together.

4. Behavioral Issues

Family therapy isn’t just for adults. If your child is acting out or you’re dealing with behavioral issues, therapy can help you learn how to manage them while prioritizing your mental health and wellness. 

If you’re willing to let your child work with a therapist, they can learn more about what’s causing their negative thoughts and feelings, as well as healthy ways to cope rather than acting out. Teaching your children from a young age how to manage their mental well-being can be extremely beneficial for their futures.

5. Blended Families

According to the Census Bureau, about 40% of families in the United States are blended. There’s often no reason why blended families can’t get along and live harmoniously with each other. But, that doesn’t mean there will never be issues. 

Blended families can deal with cultural differences, different parenting styles, and more. Therapy can help your blended family better understand each other so you can all work together to create a new, strong unit. If you’re clashing or having problems with your children coming together, therapy can make a difference. 

If you’ve never considered family therapy before, it’s not a bad time to start. If any of the issues here sound familiar, your family could likely benefit from working with a professional. Don’t hesitate to contact me for more information about family therapy or to set up an appointment soon. 

Preventing Burnout in Athletes: The Role of Counseling

As an athlete, you already know the importance of keeping your body in top condition. You stay healthy by eating right, staying physically active, and participating in preventative care with doctors and specialists. 

But, it’s just as essential to take preventative action when it comes to your mental well-being. Many athletes will argue that performance is just as much about mental fortitude as physical skill. 

Athletes aren’t immune to a variety of mental health issues, including burnout. When you’re putting hours into your sport each day and centering your life around being in top shape and excelling, it can cause fatigue, a lack of motivation or passion, or even eventual resentment toward your activity. 

If you’ve never considered counseling as a way to prevent burnout, now is the time. 

What Are the Signs of Burnout? 

Perhaps the most obvious sign of burnout for an athlete is decreased performance. You might start to notice that your stamina isn’t what it used to be, or you simply don’t feel as strong. However, there are other signs to pay attention to. 

Other physical signs of burnout include fatigue, muscle aches and pains, high blood pressure, and difficulty sleeping. 

You might also experience some mental and emotional symptoms. Athletes dealing with burnout can lose motivation and struggle with low self-esteem. You might feel helpless, and detached, and develop a lack of interest in your sport. 

Maybe you’re under a lot of stress to perform well, or maybe your training regimen has become too overwhelming. You might even be struggling with a lot of pressure, or feel like you’re “trapped” in your sport. There are plenty of things that can lead to burnout, but understanding the signs if the first step to getting the help you deserve. 

How to Deal With Burnout

Physical training is likely second nature to you. But, what can you do to manage burnout? Start by identifying the negative thought patterns causing it. What’s inhibiting your performance, and why? 

Next, practice self-care. While eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep are important, it’s essential to focus on your mental care, too. Try things like mindfulness, meditation, journaling, or deep breathing exercises to help with stress and anxiety. 

It’s also a good idea to find ways to boost your self-esteem. Burnout can cause you to doubt yourself, especially if your performance starts to struggle. Focus on your strengths, visualize victories, and improve your focus to see the best version of yourself. 

How Counseling Can Help

While self-care strategies can help with burnout symptoms, getting to the root cause and learning how to better prevent burnout in the future will make the biggest difference in your recovery. Counseling is one of the best ways to accomplish that. 

A counselor will address your personal needs and struggles. They’ll make it easier for you to understand why you’re experiencing burnout. While it’s not always easy to uncover those challenges, it’s a necessary first step. 

Counseling can also help to improve your emotional regulation. The more you’re able to understand and process your emotions, the less heavy they’ll feel. That can be a difficult thing to do on your own, so let a counselor teach you some of the most effective ways to prioritize emotional regulation. 

Finally, a counselor can help you navigate any other mental health issues that might be contributing to burnout. Whether you’re struggling with stress, dealing with depression, or you’re antsy with anxiety, counseling can help with deeper understanding and symptom management. 

Don’t let burnout get in the way of your performance or your future. If you’re interested in learning more about how sports counseling can help, contact me to set up an appointment soon. 

Exploring Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Anxiety Relief

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one of the most common and effective treatments for anxiety. While people can struggle with different symptoms and severities, CBT helps by breaking down negative thought patterns and making it easier to take control of your mental well-being. 

Anxiety is one of the most common mental health conditions in the world. As such, there are a variety of different treatment and symptom management options to consider. 

If you’ve been on the fence about CBT or simply want to learn more, let’s dig a bit deeper into what you can expect, and whether CBT is right for you. 

What Is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?

CBT is a type of talk therapy that focuses on changing negative thought patterns and behaviors. Your thoughts, feelings, and actions are all connected and work together. When you’re dealing with negative thoughts associated with anxiety, all of those things can start to become tangled, making you feel like you’re trapped within a vicious cycle. 

The goal of CBT is to help you break down the negative issues you’re facing so they’re smaller and less overwhelming. When you’re able to do that, you can start to take control over your anxious thoughts and break free from the negative patterns causing fear and worry. Not only will you feel more in control, but you’ll be able to restructure your thought process into something more positive and productive. 

What Are CBT Techniques for Anxiety?

Cognitive restructuring is a common technique therapists will often use to help with anxiety. It can be a very personal experience depending on the type of anxiety you tend to struggle with. For example, maybe you always assume the worst. Or, maybe you’re fearful of social situations. 

Those fears can impact your behaviors and become worse without some kind of reframing process. 

Your therapist will help you by encouraging you to challenge negative thoughts. You might not even know why you have certain fears or worries. Challenging them will make it easier to understand the cause of your anxiety so you can gain more power over it. 

Some therapists might have you keep a journal to record your thoughts. Journaling is a great way to make you feel more connected to your anxious thoughts so you can better understand them. Journaling can also make it easier to figure out how to replace anxious thoughts with positive ones. It serves as a tangible way to track your progress and see how far you’ve come as you continue with treatment. 

Learning to Relax

During your CBT sessions, you might also go through a few behavioral experiments. Your therapist might offer you a hypothetical situation to consider, so you can either talk about or write down your fears. They might ask you about the worst-case scenario of that situation. Then, you can talk things through and decide what you would do if that worst-case scenario were to happen. This exercise helps you feel more in control. It can make you realize that your fears might not always be based in reality. 

A CBT therapist can also help with relaxation techniques. Learning to relax on your own is one of the best ways to manage the daily symptoms of anxiety. Things like deep breathing exercises, mindfulness, and meditation are all fantastic ways to reduce stress, feel more relaxed, and ground yourself in the present rather than worrying about the “what ifs” of the future. 

Just because anxiety is a common condition doesn’t mean you have to live with it forever. If you’re interested in learning more about CBT and how it can help, feel free to set up an appointment or call for a consultation for anxiety treatment.